So, March may have been a month of ups and downs in respect to job hunting, parties and trips home, but April was a month of exciting times with friends and family, both en France and back in the UK.
The month began well, one of her best friends from school (wow, was it really that long ago BritGirl ponders) came to visit for the weekend with her three year old son! It was touch and go for a while whether they would make it, getting cheap flights at the right time was tough and tears were shed by BritGirl a few times, when her hopes were so high at having a friend to visit and spend time with and show her new home only to be dashed when flights fell through.
But it happened!! BritGirl stood at Bordeaux Airport waiting to see her friend and son come through the gates...it was exciting!! BritGirl had missed a little bit of girly time and this would be it, but also BritGirl was looking forward to showing people around her new home city and letting them experience French life. Although sometimes it got her down living so far from home and feeling alone in the daytime, it was exciting to be able to show people around but also spend quality time with them.
If only the Bordeaux weather had felt the same, it rained everyday. The skies were grey and without fail, it rained daily. In between the rain, trips to the local parks and gardens were had, ducks were fed and lots and lots of talking was had. BritGirl enjoyed the conversations, the catch ups, the glasses of wine in the evenings...this was something she had missed and was so glad to be able to do. Three year olds were fun and in this case VERY WELL BEHAVED. BritGirl played, drew, coloured, read books, watched Toy Story repeatedly and enjoyed herself. For 4 days her time was full, there was no stopping her, no routine, no job hunting - which was nice for a change - she was starting to feel herself and also like she was on top of her life in France. She could show people around and feel proud of what had been achieved in the past few months.
So, the first visit from friends went well. BritGirl was very grateful that her friend had made the effort to travel from the UK with her son on her own without her husband or support for the journey, she was lucky to have such a well behaved son too!! It was a lovely week and BritGirl felt tired afterwards, but happy.
This happiness continued, only 4 days later, she was back at the airport!! This time another flight on her own back to the UK for one of her best friend's hen weekend!! BritGirl was very excited, more time with friends and family, some secrets for the weekend and she would be busy. BritGirl had learnt over the three months en France that she needed to be busy, whatever it was...cleaning, walking, going to the shops, writing a letter, cooking, writing this blog, she had to be occupied.
BritGirl had her plan for the week, a weekend with her friends to celebrate the impending wedding, a trip home to see family and friends there, her boyfriend would then travel to the UK for the stag weekend - a messy occassion was expected, then they would both travel back to France ensemble (together). BritGirl would learn, plans were not to be kept and to keep an open mind at all times!!
First things first, the hen weekend seemed to be a success, no secrets were divulged ahead of time.....even after much pestering, questioning and rambling from the Bride to Be, the weekend went without a hitch (pardon the pun!). A day shopping and having lunch, an evening in a hotel/pub with good wine and good conversation or and the best desserts you could imagine and then a day being pampered, relaxed and thoroughly chilled out at a spa! No wellies were needed, no camping was had, no garish dressing up or strippers were needed. BritGirl had a lovely weekend and was pleased to see her friend enjoy the same...it was a brilliant start to her trip back in the UK.
Afterwards time was spent at home with friends and family, there was lots of eating, drinking, story telling and remembering times gone by as well as new stories of life today...there was also one big talking point over the week...Iceland and its volcano! Yes, at the beginning of her move to Bordeaux BritGirl remembered filling in a form about her new apartment stating that there would be no effects from volcanic action here...how wrong that was. The volcano, Eyjafjallajökul, in Iceland had errupted. No problems you would think, what would that have to do with BritGirl, she was in England and lived in France, nowhere near Iceland....until the ash clouds covered Europe. A no fly zone was called - especially across the UK where wind direction meant we were living in a bubble with no flights in or out.
BritGirl watched the news with stories of people "stranded" outside of the country and spending thousands just to get home...the world had changed over night. BritGirl realised that her boyfriend would not be flying into the UK and therefore would not make the stag do. She was right, no flights and living so far south meant he just couldnt get to the Channel for a boat/train...he would be stuck in Bordeaux for the weekend without silly boy shennanigans!
Volcanic ash cancelled BritGirl's flight back to France, she had a further week in the UK!!! This was not a problem, more time was spent with friends and family. It was hard though, everyone worked and had their lives to continue, BritGirl felt like she didn't belong somedays and did have too much time on her hands.
March Draws to a close- French parties and Interviews
So, with new found interest and hope for her life in Bordeaux, BritGirl decided a party was needed. Her boyfriend had made new friends through his job, his birthday was coming up and more effort at being social was needed....they would host a birthday party at their flat.
In the preparations, this looked like a good idea, food, drink and music - people to talk with and conversation for BritGirl.....however, the party fell on the England v France rubgy match...never a good situation in an English girl's house with lots of French people!! There was also the dilemma...what food did you serve? The French did eat a little differently to us, what wine should we buy? How much wine or beer did we need?! The whole day was taken up with preparations, shopping and making space in the fridge for all the food and drink....then came that horrible point in hosting a party, the waiting! You sit, worrying no one will turn up, that it was a mistake arranging it after all and you just wanted a quiet night at home!
Then, someone arrived and you worried that they would be the only attendees, which potentially would be worse than no one arriving at all!! But fear not, BritGirl's worries were unecessary - the kitchen was full of people by 10pm (French evenings always start much later than those in England), wine and beer was flowing - more beer than wine, food was being eaten and bad french music was being played.
This was something BritGirl never thought she would get used to, music choice for French in their 20s-30s was either VERY bad french rap/dance/crooning music which was never pretty or VERY out of date English tunes which only reminded BritGirl of her school days - so overall the music always confused BritGirl.
With music en France came dancing and lots of it....the friends Andy had made LOVED TO DANCE, regardless of how bad the music was or how silly they all looked, dancing happened! BritGirl never really one for dancing had to join in too - it was the way...you just did it!
I wont mention the rugby, as you probably guessed, it was not to be, although it was an English household therefore England ruled...it was definitely a French win and the French cheer was heard...at that point, BritGirl headed for the wine and danced!
So, first French party hosted and a success was had. Everyone seemed to enjoy themselves, BritGirl and her boyfriend had been good hosts,the food and drink was gone (except the 12 bottles of wine BritGirl had been given as gifts...with gifts like that more parties would be hosted!) BritGirl felt happy with herself, although these were not necessarily her friends, she had enjoyed socialising, having fun and spending an evening where it was not just her and her boyfriend - although as lovely as he was, sometimes, you just needed different social contact, conversation and even dancing!!
March was a month of firsts, first trip to the French job centre, first flights on her own, first French party hosted and wait for it...first French interview!! Yes, BritGirl was surprised too, after a month and a half of serious looking she had an interview for a job at a new hotel on the other side of town. After a difficult telephone call making the arrangements (phone calls en francais will always be the hardest part of living here), a few scrambled emails to change the location of the interview as BritGirl didnt have a car and they wanted ot interview her miles from town out in the country...even though the job was in the city centre!! Nevertheless after a number of emails, the interview was arranged and fast approaching - it would be at a Bar near the station.
After years of working in recruitment, BritGirl often knew interviews were held in hotel bars but this bar, was literally just that, a bar opposite the station often full of tourists. She was nervous, more nervous than she had ever been before....hours were spent writing notes of what she could say in French to answer potential questions about herself, her career, her skills, the job and anything else that she could possibly prepare for. It was like exam revision...she wanted this so much....anything to make her feel a little more worthwhile than the current routine of housework and walks.
Nerves were made worse through the note taking, French grammar checking...although working in recruitment had given her model answers to questions such as "What are your strengths/weaknesses"; nearly three months without work had dented BritGirl's confidence so much that she wasn't too sure what her strengths were? In her old job, she could have told you, but what now? Without a job or proficiency in the local language, what really were her strengths?!
Nevertheless, friends coached her on from a distance with emails and texts, her boyfriend's Dad (retired French teacher, thank you very much) helped with French grammar and praise and then the day was here, her first interview in 5 years and her first interview in French would happen.
However, it was not quite what she expected...another common theme with her life so far in France, it never quite went as you expected it to. She greeted the Hotel Manager and that went fine, they sat outside the bar and ordered coffee...it was windy so the first 10 minutes were spent holding onto papers and CVs in the wind, the next 10 minutes were spent with her interviewer trying to light her cigerette in the wind....BritGirl felt uncomfortable. This didn't feel right, it wasn't just the location or the relaxed nature of the interview or even the language (although that did play a role), she just could not connect with the Hotel Manager.
The lady talked a lot, about the hotel, when it opened, her team so far, what she was looking for and the company - BritGirl understood most of this and did feel that it was a good start, if she could understand then she was getting somewhere, regardless of the fact that she hadn't really connected with the person she would have to work with if successful. BritGirl hated the fact she didnt really have any questions to ask...they had all been covered. BritGirl also disliked that she had prepared so much for this interview with model answers or phrases in French but few questions were asked of her...again like the job centre, the lady spoke and reviewed her CV but never really asked BritGirl about her!!!
The point where BritGirl knew the interview would not turn out well soon came....discussions of a start date came and BritGirl explained in early April she would be going to the UK for a week and although this trip could be shortened it could not be cancelled, it was her friend's hen weekend after all and that was not going to be missed. Instantly the interview took a cooler approach...it was left that the Hotel Manager would be in touch, but she reiterated she did need someone who could start soon, which BritGirl assured her she could, but would need 4 days off regardless.
How did BritGirl feel after her first interview? Deflated is probably the best word. She sat on the tram on her way home, with her sunglasses hiding the tears brewing. She had prepared so much, but none of it had been needed, she had been positive and tried to speak French when needed, but the interviewer didn't seem to connect or be that interested.
After thinking about it and numerous pep talks from friends and family, BritGirl tried not to worry, what would be would be...she needed a job but as a good friend reminded her, she also needed to like where she was working and the interview was much about her interviewing the company/new manager as it was for them interviewing her.
In the end BritGirl did not get the hotel job, an email came through days letter, politely saying thank you for your time but no thank you. It was expected. BritGirl had realised this, after letting the interview experience sink in, she had not connected with the Hotel Manager, she had not conveyed herself very well, her commitments at home had not fitted in and in reality, did she really want to work for someone she had not felt connected to?
Again at this point BritGirl has to thank her friends back in England, all gave her great hope and motivation that something would come along and it was all experience. After all, as one important friend said, "this was an adventure and the interview experience only added to that". It might be true, living en France was an adventure, with something new everyday but more importantly BritGirl was learning an awful lot about herself...time on her own made her realise how important her friends and family were, how important the small things were, how she could appreciate life at home as much as work, how relaxed she had become but at the same time, and perhaps more surprising for BritGirl was that she was weaker than she thought. Her confidence was low, she learnt that her identity came very much from what she did and her work...without a job she was not very sure of herself at all. (Is that a sad fact of our lives BritGirl wondered, that so much of who we are and how we feel comes from a job?)
Friends re-assured her that she was not weak, but actually strong - she was living in a foriegn country for heavens sake, with lots of time on her hands to think and worry and over think. They were right of course, in many ways, although BritGirl learnt her weaknesses and worried about them, she did often forget her strengths - she was living en France with her boyfriend without any close friends or family nearby, it was a foriegn country with a foriegn language and she was doing it! Of course she would feel lonely, frustrated, upset even angry somedays, but one day at a time and one baguette a day and she would get used to her new life.
The Begining of March - The French Job Centre
So, February came and went, BritGirl's boyfriend completed his first month of work en France and enjoyed every minute of it.
BritGirl knew her way around the city, she had explored, she had written letter after letter to friends and family at home - the old fashioned letter writing would not be forgotten by BritGirl. Letters to and from friends and family became very important; it became almost therapeutic to write her thoughts and feelings down and send them away. There was no expectation from BritGirl for someone to reply to these ramblings (of which they often were), but it was merely a means to air her thoughts and not feeling quite so alone. Friends back in England were great, they kept BritGirl going through her first month alone without a job, but now it was time, time to find a job.
This was a tough challenge, in England, BritGirl had always been successful looking for work, had LOVED her last job and still struggled to accept that she was now fully reliant on her boyfriend and not the independent girl she had been for the past 5 years back home. Her confidence was a little low, the fear of talking a foriegn anguage, of not being understood or making an idiot of herself was always present...this did not stop the job hunting, but definitely made BritGirl a little uncertain of her new lifein Bordeaux and the challenge to work and find that indepdent girl she had been not long ago.
Although CVs had been sent to numerous companies across Bordeaux, from hotels, the tourist office and other larger companies across the city, little positive had come back. After all, the country, like most of Europe was still coming out of the recession, or la crise as we called it here....and there was little need for someone who spoke a certain level of French but lots of English.
So with that in mind BritGirl registered with the French Job Centre - Pole D'Emploi - for job searches and merely to see what it was all about. She was not quite expecting the notification of a meeting at the job centre in the first week of March - which she MUST attend!
Another big task for BritGirl alone - this would all be in French, clearly, it was the French job centre, helping French people find work. BritGirl worried; would they be unhelpful because I gave up a job in England to come here? Would they be rude because she did not speak fluent French yet expected to work?
Lots of worries and plans were made, notes and hopes! At 8.30am BritGirl trundled off to explore Pole D'Emploi, having never really been to a job centre back in England she had little idea what to expect here...in the end high rise offices, people waiting outside in the morning cold to register or ask for advice greeted her. With French efficiency BritGirl's appointment was on time and she was shown to a desk...here a French man preceeded to talk in French, fast for about half an hour...he covered how Pole D'Emploi worked, he talked about BritGirl's CV, with a few questions for her to answer (but very few) and then that seemed to be it?!
Did BritGirl need anything else? He asked!? Well..... BritGirl was not sure, she had thought this meeting would be about her, what she wanted to do, where she had come from, her concerns, her questions...but it turned out that was not really important....the man showed her how to search for jobs online - after 4 years in recruitment this seemed a little wasted on her, but nevertheless she listened - sometimes looking blank as the French washed over her at a speed you would not believe.
After thanking the man for his help (?) and collecting the vast numbers of paper she had acquired BritGirl quickly left the job centre. Not particular helpful, she knew no more about finding a job in Bordeaux than she did before. Did she feel more confident after making the appointment and listening to French? She was not really sure, should she have spoken more? Should she have asked more questions? Should the man have been more interactive?
Nevertheless, it was done, BritGirl could and would and did start sending applications through the job centre, finding contacts for jobs and looking at different companies as a result....was there any positive feedback from this? That...you will just have to wait and see!!
Only two days after the job centre experience, BritGirl was taking her first lone flight back to the UK....without a job and after a month on her own, it had been decided that a week back at home with friends and family would be an ideal break! Some will say that BritGirl should stay in France, she lived there after all for heavens sake and experience French life everyday, but for her sanity and also to enjoy some of the additional time she had without a job it made sense to see friends and family.
The flight was uneventful, BritGirl was proud for making it on her own. As I've written before, the small things suddenly become huge when you live in a foriegn country and start doing very different things to your life before!! Days and evenings were spent talking, drinking, laughing and visiting places with BritGirl's friends and family and she loved every minute of it!
One important task was achieved during this visit home, BritGirl got her hair cut!! Yes, BritGirl went all the way back to the UK for a hair cut!! Do they not have hair dressers en France I hear you ask?! Well, yes, but they are so expensive that BritGirl cannot face it, this along with the fear of explaining what she wants done with her hair wrong en francais and leaving the salon with a horrific hair cut. Plus, the reality is that even when she lived in Cambridge, she still travelled 2 hours to her parents' to have her hair cut by her childhood hairdresser, so yes, BritGirl may be 27 and a grown up living in a foriegn country, but that still doesnt stop some routines existing!!
So....that was it for the job centre in March wasn't it?! NO! It was not!! Whilst back in the UK, BritGirl received a call from her boyfriend - she had received an invitation to a workshop at the job centre on her first day back in Bordeaux. Now when I write invitiation, that is probably an inaccurate definition - there was no option in attendance, as BritGirl had registered with the job centre she was obliged to attend, unless there was a valid reason...and lists of laws (loi) were listed to reinforce this!
So, again, BritGirl set off for the job centre, even more nervous than on her last visit. Going back to the UK had given BritGirl a little more confidence in her job hunt, she was capable and qualified and had the skills to work with people so she WOULD and COULD find a job, but this confidence seemed to disappear little by little as she made her way there. A workshop? She did not much like forced social events like these back in the UK, how would she fare when they were in French, with French people who she felt, probably quite rightly, deserved and needed a job in France more than she did...after all, she had given up a perfectly good job to move here.
The workshop opened with a dramatic twist...one girl (with her child) threw a chair across the room and walked out upon finding that the session would last 2 hours and she was not sure she could manage that with her child... nobody quite knew what to say at this point, so an awkward silence started the workshop. After that episode when everyone calmed down, BritGirl told the "teacher" she was in English so if possible could they speak a little slower......they didnt. Needless to say, when things got going, the french sped up!! The session, looking back, was not as scary as it could have been and was probably a good lesson for BritGirl en francais - a workbook was worked through, with hints, tips and questions about job hunting, discussions from here continued as to how best to look for the right job, target companies and sell yourself. It may not have been the most informative of sessions (BritGirl was truly frustrated more often than not, that she had lots of thoughts, experiences and advice to give from her previous career in recruitment back in the UK, but could not, for the life of her convey this in French). However, it was more useful than meeting one at the job centre and had been a good french experience for BritGirl.
As soon as she left the building, BritGirl rang one of her "confidants" en Angleterre. Now I write confidant, because this was what he had become. Over the intial two months in Bordeaux, through texts, emails and letters, BritGirl had aired her grievances, worries and fears to this very strong, young man back home. The cost of the call did not matter, BritGirl just needed to tell someone that she had managed the workshop - another big achievement in a small way! The phone call made BritGirl even more confident that it could work and she could find a job...walking along the river back home and on the phone to her friend, BritGirl thought life in Bordeaux might not be so tough after all.
BritGirl knew her way around the city, she had explored, she had written letter after letter to friends and family at home - the old fashioned letter writing would not be forgotten by BritGirl. Letters to and from friends and family became very important; it became almost therapeutic to write her thoughts and feelings down and send them away. There was no expectation from BritGirl for someone to reply to these ramblings (of which they often were), but it was merely a means to air her thoughts and not feeling quite so alone. Friends back in England were great, they kept BritGirl going through her first month alone without a job, but now it was time, time to find a job.
This was a tough challenge, in England, BritGirl had always been successful looking for work, had LOVED her last job and still struggled to accept that she was now fully reliant on her boyfriend and not the independent girl she had been for the past 5 years back home. Her confidence was a little low, the fear of talking a foriegn anguage, of not being understood or making an idiot of herself was always present...this did not stop the job hunting, but definitely made BritGirl a little uncertain of her new lifein Bordeaux and the challenge to work and find that indepdent girl she had been not long ago.
Although CVs had been sent to numerous companies across Bordeaux, from hotels, the tourist office and other larger companies across the city, little positive had come back. After all, the country, like most of Europe was still coming out of the recession, or la crise as we called it here....and there was little need for someone who spoke a certain level of French but lots of English.
So with that in mind BritGirl registered with the French Job Centre - Pole D'Emploi - for job searches and merely to see what it was all about. She was not quite expecting the notification of a meeting at the job centre in the first week of March - which she MUST attend!
Another big task for BritGirl alone - this would all be in French, clearly, it was the French job centre, helping French people find work. BritGirl worried; would they be unhelpful because I gave up a job in England to come here? Would they be rude because she did not speak fluent French yet expected to work?
Lots of worries and plans were made, notes and hopes! At 8.30am BritGirl trundled off to explore Pole D'Emploi, having never really been to a job centre back in England she had little idea what to expect here...in the end high rise offices, people waiting outside in the morning cold to register or ask for advice greeted her. With French efficiency BritGirl's appointment was on time and she was shown to a desk...here a French man preceeded to talk in French, fast for about half an hour...he covered how Pole D'Emploi worked, he talked about BritGirl's CV, with a few questions for her to answer (but very few) and then that seemed to be it?!
Did BritGirl need anything else? He asked!? Well..... BritGirl was not sure, she had thought this meeting would be about her, what she wanted to do, where she had come from, her concerns, her questions...but it turned out that was not really important....the man showed her how to search for jobs online - after 4 years in recruitment this seemed a little wasted on her, but nevertheless she listened - sometimes looking blank as the French washed over her at a speed you would not believe.
After thanking the man for his help (?) and collecting the vast numbers of paper she had acquired BritGirl quickly left the job centre. Not particular helpful, she knew no more about finding a job in Bordeaux than she did before. Did she feel more confident after making the appointment and listening to French? She was not really sure, should she have spoken more? Should she have asked more questions? Should the man have been more interactive?
Nevertheless, it was done, BritGirl could and would and did start sending applications through the job centre, finding contacts for jobs and looking at different companies as a result....was there any positive feedback from this? That...you will just have to wait and see!!
Only two days after the job centre experience, BritGirl was taking her first lone flight back to the UK....without a job and after a month on her own, it had been decided that a week back at home with friends and family would be an ideal break! Some will say that BritGirl should stay in France, she lived there after all for heavens sake and experience French life everyday, but for her sanity and also to enjoy some of the additional time she had without a job it made sense to see friends and family.
The flight was uneventful, BritGirl was proud for making it on her own. As I've written before, the small things suddenly become huge when you live in a foriegn country and start doing very different things to your life before!! Days and evenings were spent talking, drinking, laughing and visiting places with BritGirl's friends and family and she loved every minute of it!
One important task was achieved during this visit home, BritGirl got her hair cut!! Yes, BritGirl went all the way back to the UK for a hair cut!! Do they not have hair dressers en France I hear you ask?! Well, yes, but they are so expensive that BritGirl cannot face it, this along with the fear of explaining what she wants done with her hair wrong en francais and leaving the salon with a horrific hair cut. Plus, the reality is that even when she lived in Cambridge, she still travelled 2 hours to her parents' to have her hair cut by her childhood hairdresser, so yes, BritGirl may be 27 and a grown up living in a foriegn country, but that still doesnt stop some routines existing!!
So....that was it for the job centre in March wasn't it?! NO! It was not!! Whilst back in the UK, BritGirl received a call from her boyfriend - she had received an invitation to a workshop at the job centre on her first day back in Bordeaux. Now when I write invitiation, that is probably an inaccurate definition - there was no option in attendance, as BritGirl had registered with the job centre she was obliged to attend, unless there was a valid reason...and lists of laws (loi) were listed to reinforce this!
So, again, BritGirl set off for the job centre, even more nervous than on her last visit. Going back to the UK had given BritGirl a little more confidence in her job hunt, she was capable and qualified and had the skills to work with people so she WOULD and COULD find a job, but this confidence seemed to disappear little by little as she made her way there. A workshop? She did not much like forced social events like these back in the UK, how would she fare when they were in French, with French people who she felt, probably quite rightly, deserved and needed a job in France more than she did...after all, she had given up a perfectly good job to move here.
The workshop opened with a dramatic twist...one girl (with her child) threw a chair across the room and walked out upon finding that the session would last 2 hours and she was not sure she could manage that with her child... nobody quite knew what to say at this point, so an awkward silence started the workshop. After that episode when everyone calmed down, BritGirl told the "teacher" she was in English so if possible could they speak a little slower......they didnt. Needless to say, when things got going, the french sped up!! The session, looking back, was not as scary as it could have been and was probably a good lesson for BritGirl en francais - a workbook was worked through, with hints, tips and questions about job hunting, discussions from here continued as to how best to look for the right job, target companies and sell yourself. It may not have been the most informative of sessions (BritGirl was truly frustrated more often than not, that she had lots of thoughts, experiences and advice to give from her previous career in recruitment back in the UK, but could not, for the life of her convey this in French). However, it was more useful than meeting one at the job centre and had been a good french experience for BritGirl.
As soon as she left the building, BritGirl rang one of her "confidants" en Angleterre. Now I write confidant, because this was what he had become. Over the intial two months in Bordeaux, through texts, emails and letters, BritGirl had aired her grievances, worries and fears to this very strong, young man back home. The cost of the call did not matter, BritGirl just needed to tell someone that she had managed the workshop - another big achievement in a small way! The phone call made BritGirl even more confident that it could work and she could find a job...walking along the river back home and on the phone to her friend, BritGirl thought life in Bordeaux might not be so tough after all.
Final Two Weeks in February - Job Hunting and Plumbing
So....BritGirl's boyfriend worked everyday, his life in France was taking shape...he came home with stories of work, colleagues, things he had learned, new french words, mistaken communications...his job was going well, he was settling in, he had a home and a job here.
BritGirl....a little different. She spent the days on her own - a combination of long walks along the riverside or into town. The weight was falling from her hips. After 5 years in an office job with working lunches at her desk, the fresh air and lack of a car meant BritGirl did more exercise than she had ever done before! Other than walks, BritGirl was a model housewife in many ways, a clean and tidy house, new photographs and "female touches" appeared around the new french flat and meals were prepared and thought out for the evening.
It was this that BritGirl's boyfriend would say was one of the reasons he liked BritGirl not working, nice food in the evenings! Not of course that back in the UK BritGirl didn't rustle up something delicious from the cupboard after a long day at work, coming home to clean the flat and cook for the evening...she did - but with limited thought and creativity. It was true, en France with time to kill, meals were a little more time consuming or thought out.
BritGirl loved and still does love the French supermarche - the choice, the variety. Honestly you have never seen fruit and veg like it, piled high, different shapes, sizes and colours - from the exotic to the plain old ordinary. The fish counter is like nothing England would have seen before. The newness never rubs off...the vegetables in tins, the beans and sausages in jars that look like something no one would ever want to eat.....the list is endless,there is always something to see and therefore always something different to try or add into the shopping basket.
During the cold winter months, homemade soups a plenty were tried and tested with none other than French Onion Soup being the resounding success. So yes, BritGirl might not have a job or friends but she made sure she kept herself as busy as possible.
It was unfortunate that this also meant many an hour waiting for plumbers....yes, think back, remember the "entrance" to the flat where numerous flaws and problems with BritGirls new home were found...well some of these needed action toute suite.
And after numerous emails/conversations with the letting agent, after 6 weeks, a plumber would finally be in to sort out the leaking and super wobbly toilet. Yes, this was the worst of our problems...constant running water and what felt like an earthquake every time you sat on the loo!! Not a pleasant experience!!
BritGirl again found another simliarity to home and the gaz man at this point...plumbers did not always arrive when they said they would! After hours waiting, a missed appointment and a little more waiting, the plumbers arrived - yes, apparently to sort out the toilet - in a room where there really only is space for one person; two plumbers were required. BritGirl managed to sweet talk the plumbers en francais...bien sur, here you did not offer workmen tea, oh no, but coffee!!! Not sure they fully appreciated the english attempt at coffee in a mug - think they expecteed something a little smaller but still...toilet repaired - another accomplishment for Brit Girl on her own.
Although this was not the last of the problems with the flat..oh no the ongoing cracks and damp persisted but complaining and emails to the letting agent were to no avail....en France one needs to be patient. Now BritGirl's friends and family will tell you that this is not her a strong point, but in Bordeaux it was needed....careful emails were written, photographs were taken, if we had to wait we would do, but we would be prepared to prove our point and ensure that when the bathroom was repaired (and BritGirl was sure it was going to be) it would be recorded that it was something that had been an issue since pre 6th January and our grand demenagement. Its unfotunate as I sit here now and write this - more than six months on, that we are still waiting for something to be done! We have had progress, visits from the letting agent but only when rain water decided to make an appearance in our bath...but still nothing more than a few forms to be filled in and more patience to be had...ah the french way!
BritGirl....a little different. She spent the days on her own - a combination of long walks along the riverside or into town. The weight was falling from her hips. After 5 years in an office job with working lunches at her desk, the fresh air and lack of a car meant BritGirl did more exercise than she had ever done before! Other than walks, BritGirl was a model housewife in many ways, a clean and tidy house, new photographs and "female touches" appeared around the new french flat and meals were prepared and thought out for the evening.
It was this that BritGirl's boyfriend would say was one of the reasons he liked BritGirl not working, nice food in the evenings! Not of course that back in the UK BritGirl didn't rustle up something delicious from the cupboard after a long day at work, coming home to clean the flat and cook for the evening...she did - but with limited thought and creativity. It was true, en France with time to kill, meals were a little more time consuming or thought out.
BritGirl loved and still does love the French supermarche - the choice, the variety. Honestly you have never seen fruit and veg like it, piled high, different shapes, sizes and colours - from the exotic to the plain old ordinary. The fish counter is like nothing England would have seen before. The newness never rubs off...the vegetables in tins, the beans and sausages in jars that look like something no one would ever want to eat.....the list is endless,there is always something to see and therefore always something different to try or add into the shopping basket.
During the cold winter months, homemade soups a plenty were tried and tested with none other than French Onion Soup being the resounding success. So yes, BritGirl might not have a job or friends but she made sure she kept herself as busy as possible.
It was unfortunate that this also meant many an hour waiting for plumbers....yes, think back, remember the "entrance" to the flat where numerous flaws and problems with BritGirls new home were found...well some of these needed action toute suite.
And after numerous emails/conversations with the letting agent, after 6 weeks, a plumber would finally be in to sort out the leaking and super wobbly toilet. Yes, this was the worst of our problems...constant running water and what felt like an earthquake every time you sat on the loo!! Not a pleasant experience!!
BritGirl again found another simliarity to home and the gaz man at this point...plumbers did not always arrive when they said they would! After hours waiting, a missed appointment and a little more waiting, the plumbers arrived - yes, apparently to sort out the toilet - in a room where there really only is space for one person; two plumbers were required. BritGirl managed to sweet talk the plumbers en francais...bien sur, here you did not offer workmen tea, oh no, but coffee!!! Not sure they fully appreciated the english attempt at coffee in a mug - think they expecteed something a little smaller but still...toilet repaired - another accomplishment for Brit Girl on her own.
Although this was not the last of the problems with the flat..oh no the ongoing cracks and damp persisted but complaining and emails to the letting agent were to no avail....en France one needs to be patient. Now BritGirl's friends and family will tell you that this is not her a strong point, but in Bordeaux it was needed....careful emails were written, photographs were taken, if we had to wait we would do, but we would be prepared to prove our point and ensure that when the bathroom was repaired (and BritGirl was sure it was going to be) it would be recorded that it was something that had been an issue since pre 6th January and our grand demenagement. Its unfotunate as I sit here now and write this - more than six months on, that we are still waiting for something to be done! We have had progress, visits from the letting agent but only when rain water decided to make an appearance in our bath...but still nothing more than a few forms to be filled in and more patience to be had...ah the french way!
W/c 8th February - BritGirl goes it alone
So.....BritGirl's boyfriend had his first day and week at work en France...it all seemed to go well. Lots of names, places, rules and procedures to remember. Remember en France bureaucracy and paperwork is the key!
As for BritGirl, the first week alone went well. A bank account was opened, yes, BritGirl was now a proud bank account holder en France and had opened the account all on her own, en francaise!!! Another proud achievement after a month of living here.
You learn when you live in a foreign country, with foreign languages and no friends to take pride in the smallest of tasks, answering someone when they ask you for directions, opening a bank account in the lingo.....achievements seem to become smaller but more important.
So, bank account open and online access working...now all BritGirl needed was her own money...living off her boyfriend's income was something she had never done and was not really looking forward to....independence had been an important factor in their relationship and in her life for the past 5 years.
But hang on, BritGirl made another achievement on her own, she ventured out of town to the "banlieues" (french suburbs) to find the health care office....which turned out to be in not the nicest area of town. But neverthess less, public transport worked, she was there with her forms in hand....now all she had to do was have a meeting with the nice French lady to be covered by the French healthcare system...nervous, dictionary in her bag, BritGirl sat in the waiting room and waited!!
Nerves seemed pointless, once the forms were handed over alongside copies of passports that was it! C'est tout! Little talking or interest was needed. It was just a matter of waiting...well thats what BritGirl understood would happen - she instantly regretted not taking copies of all the documents she had just handed over in case something went awry (ever the pessimist en France). However, again BritGirl would learn, that generally, although slow processes and typically bureaucratic they did usually work and the outcome would be what you expected. In this instance, BritGirl did later receive her Carte Vitale for healthcare and a social security number for one year. This did not make her feel more French...only more foreign and uncertain of the procedures and processes if she ever did need to see a Doctor!
The first week on her own en France seemed to pass without hitch; the french administration was a success and BritGirl had managed this en francaise, the flat was now clean and tidy with everything where it should be and loooooong letters had been written to friends and family explaining life in the bubble.
Question remains, how will BritGirl manage on her own going forwards?
As for BritGirl, the first week alone went well. A bank account was opened, yes, BritGirl was now a proud bank account holder en France and had opened the account all on her own, en francaise!!! Another proud achievement after a month of living here.
You learn when you live in a foreign country, with foreign languages and no friends to take pride in the smallest of tasks, answering someone when they ask you for directions, opening a bank account in the lingo.....achievements seem to become smaller but more important.
So, bank account open and online access working...now all BritGirl needed was her own money...living off her boyfriend's income was something she had never done and was not really looking forward to....independence had been an important factor in their relationship and in her life for the past 5 years.
But hang on, BritGirl made another achievement on her own, she ventured out of town to the "banlieues" (french suburbs) to find the health care office....which turned out to be in not the nicest area of town. But neverthess less, public transport worked, she was there with her forms in hand....now all she had to do was have a meeting with the nice French lady to be covered by the French healthcare system...nervous, dictionary in her bag, BritGirl sat in the waiting room and waited!!
Nerves seemed pointless, once the forms were handed over alongside copies of passports that was it! C'est tout! Little talking or interest was needed. It was just a matter of waiting...well thats what BritGirl understood would happen - she instantly regretted not taking copies of all the documents she had just handed over in case something went awry (ever the pessimist en France). However, again BritGirl would learn, that generally, although slow processes and typically bureaucratic they did usually work and the outcome would be what you expected. In this instance, BritGirl did later receive her Carte Vitale for healthcare and a social security number for one year. This did not make her feel more French...only more foreign and uncertain of the procedures and processes if she ever did need to see a Doctor!
The first week on her own en France seemed to pass without hitch; the french administration was a success and BritGirl had managed this en francaise, the flat was now clean and tidy with everything where it should be and loooooong letters had been written to friends and family explaining life in the bubble.
Question remains, how will BritGirl manage on her own going forwards?
W/c 1st February - The Bubble Changed
So nearly one month into life en France and already a week had been spent back in the UK with friends and family.
However, it should be noted that BritGirl was and still is very pleased with the accomplishments made during this short period of time (so much so she WILL list them!!)
* Cancelled flights aside, BritGirl and her worldly possessions made it to Bordeaux on the 6th January 2010
* BritGirl struggled through difficult "entrances", emptying of white vans and purchasing of whole kitchens and bedrooms in a foriegn language...it may not have been anywhere near perfect, but it was understood and no real disasters had struck!
* Utility appointments were underway and arranged
* The flat was starting to feel like a home from home
* The whirlwind purchasing of the internet, television and phone paid off....
Yes, the week we arrived back from the UK, our packages to communicate outside of the Bordeaux bubble arrived....we would be back in communicado with friends, family and THE WORLD!! Assuming we could follow the instruction en francais and plug the right wires into the right sockets in the right order...ahh another french hurdle!!
But BritGirl's boyfriend did his work.....first we had TV - all be it French TV, a million and one channels of people speaking French.....but still we had achieved part one, a television which worked! Step two, we could make phone calls and get this... in France you can call landlines across Europe and the World for free.....so hours of calls to friends/family could be had...we could even call people in New Zealand/America if the need so took us!! You may not realise how nice it was for BritGirl to pick up the phone and talk to her Mum/Dad(rare!)/Sisters without thinking of cost or trying to get a text message to convey her thoughts.
Next stage was the internet, with the yellow wire in the yellow plug and green wire in the green plug we had lift off.....the internet as well as the television and phone!! Life with email, facebook and the world wide web was back - we were living outside of the bubble!!
At this time, the Bordeaux Bubble was changing for BritGirl in many ways - the world felt much bigger when you could talk to people across the channel or watch the news about hurricanes and wars in faraway countries.....home felt further away...but the bubble would change for good on the 8th February 2010, when BritGirl's boyfriend started work.
After all the job was the reason for the move to la France, but by her boyfriend starting work, BritGirl was well and truly on her own.....to make a home, to shop, to find a job, to learn the lingo all in a foreign country with no friends close.
From this date, the bubble was still there, but it was altogether a different bubble. It was at this point that BritGirl had a few tears (and later a lot of tears) and learnt a hell of a lot about herself. From the beginning BritGirl was sure that the biggest challenge she would face was on the 6th January at 5am standing in the snow outside her home preparing to make a long journey - without really knowing how - to Bordeaux, but in actual fact, the toughest challenge - or adventure as BritGirl's wise friends would assure her, was to live in France, learn the language and find a job whilst her boyfriend had all of that, in many ways, ready-made for him.
The next chapter of the journey starts here.....
W/c 18th January - Back to the UK already?
Week 2 on our own continued in much the same thread as week 1, the "Bordeaux Bubble" remained entact, letters continued to be written to friends and family, the flat was taking shape and starting to feel like a home and the daily trips to the cafe and free internet showed a vain attempt to keep up to date with life outside Bordeaux.
Appointments were made to deal with the practicalities of "Vie en France".....this again brought home to BritGirl just the size hurdle that she was jumping in attempting to set up home in a foreign country, away from all her friends, families and comforts....confidence at times was lacking. Days were set aside for the Gaz man to visit....it was times like these that BritGirl realised not all things were that different between home country and new country....gaz men appointments still took up the best part of a day and did not always guarantee a visit!!
Phone calls were made to arrange appointments to have the boiler serviced and checked - apparently (if BritGirl understood correctly) this was not a Landlord responsibility but a tenant responsibility and cost...as if the concept of gas in a foriegn country did not scare BritGirl enough...the need to call a company and speak french to get a french man to visit the apartment to check everything was in working order and pay for the privilege was!!
But it wasn't all doom and gloom, the bubble effect had positives......the city was explored on foot daily, new places, shops, cafes, streets, buildings were found. Meals were eaten out, if and when the menus were understood. Life was relaxed, after all, for this time neither BritGirl nor her boyfriend were working! Walks along the river never became tiresome - as long as suitable shoes, hats and scarves were worn. BritGirl even started thinking about jobs and work in France....confidence picked up for a while!
The main driving force here....in a weeks time BritGirl and boyfriend would be back in England. Yes, after only three weeks in France, a return trip had been booked and arranged. Initially under the pretence that the boyfriend had work to finish off in the UK, but also as a reward for the hard work put in during the first three weeks of 2010...time with friends, family and home comforts alongside the fact that in the UK there wasnt always the need to think before you spoke.
The diary was full, lunch appointments were made, places to stay organised, family to see, transport to and from the airport arranged. BritGirl was leaving her bubble! If only for a week.
Appointments were made to deal with the practicalities of "Vie en France".....this again brought home to BritGirl just the size hurdle that she was jumping in attempting to set up home in a foreign country, away from all her friends, families and comforts....confidence at times was lacking. Days were set aside for the Gaz man to visit....it was times like these that BritGirl realised not all things were that different between home country and new country....gaz men appointments still took up the best part of a day and did not always guarantee a visit!!
Phone calls were made to arrange appointments to have the boiler serviced and checked - apparently (if BritGirl understood correctly) this was not a Landlord responsibility but a tenant responsibility and cost...as if the concept of gas in a foriegn country did not scare BritGirl enough...the need to call a company and speak french to get a french man to visit the apartment to check everything was in working order and pay for the privilege was!!
But it wasn't all doom and gloom, the bubble effect had positives......the city was explored on foot daily, new places, shops, cafes, streets, buildings were found. Meals were eaten out, if and when the menus were understood. Life was relaxed, after all, for this time neither BritGirl nor her boyfriend were working! Walks along the river never became tiresome - as long as suitable shoes, hats and scarves were worn. BritGirl even started thinking about jobs and work in France....confidence picked up for a while!
The main driving force here....in a weeks time BritGirl and boyfriend would be back in England. Yes, after only three weeks in France, a return trip had been booked and arranged. Initially under the pretence that the boyfriend had work to finish off in the UK, but also as a reward for the hard work put in during the first three weeks of 2010...time with friends, family and home comforts alongside the fact that in the UK there wasnt always the need to think before you spoke.
The diary was full, lunch appointments were made, places to stay organised, family to see, transport to and from the airport arranged. BritGirl was leaving her bubble! If only for a week.
W/c 11th January - Bordeaux Bubble
The first week a Bordeaux was spent much the same was as the first weekend for BritGirl, however, the BIG difference this time....the parents were not there.
On Monday morning, BritGirl's Mum and Dad set off in the white van heading for England...that was it, no more white van, no more parents to turn to and rely on when the realisation of living in France hit. The morning they left BritGirl was close to tears....another piece of her comfort blanket would be miles and miles away....but again, no tears were shed. Goodbyes were made and BritGirl was in Bordeaux with her boyfriend alone!
And yes, this week was continual furniture building and box opening to the tune of comments like "why did we bring this?", "where shall we put this?" and "don't put that there".
The manual labour was relatively easy, muscles were already aching from unpacking the van, tools were in place, the language of the task was anglais....BritGirl could have been in any country, in any apartment anywhere in the world and doing this.
In the evenings, letters to friends and family were written, "we are here, we arrived safely...listen to the adventure that was our journey, apartment is coming together, more news to follow"...again another english task, the fact that Brit Girl was living and breathing in France had not really hit home yet.
But it did.....for the first two weeks, the "Bordeaux Bubble" was formed. BritGirl and her boyfriend had a british mobile phone each but that was all, no internet, no television, c'est tout. Costs of calling home were high, text messages were not free, we knew nothing about world events or changes. We could not maintain keeping in touch with the world outside of our Bubble like this. So yes, BritGirl was going to have to talk French and at somepoint venture out of the comfort of the flat to buy tools and boxes for the television, phone, internets and mobiles.
However, have you ever thought, how do you research internet providers without the internet? Yes, they have got you right there haven't they!! We wandered around town looking at the shop windows, but not daring to go in for fear of someone accosting us and selling us something we didnt want.....savvy customers you see, thats what we wanted to be, but how!!
How did landlines work in France? Did our apartment already have a number? The plugs are different in France, but what about connections for televisions/phones? Questions which all needed answering, our letting agent was tres helpful with some of these mundane but ever important facts and otherwise we were on our own to figure it out.
Luckily BritGirl found a cafe with 30 minutes daily free internet browsing, so everyday for about 2 weeks, BritGirl trekked to the cafe, bought her espresso and croissant and used the internet at a speed never seen before - brief emails to friends, "I'm here, its scary, but I'm doing OK", emails to parents, "help us look at the cost of the internet? Tv? Phone? Where do we get all of this from?" and for BritGirl's boyfriend ongoing work emails....even though he no longer worked in the UK!!
Dont think BritGirl had moved to France unprepared (that just is NOT how BritGirl works, there is a plan to everything... or so she thought until she moved to La France)! She had looked into internet provision and mobile phones, but without actually being in the country and understanding what was needed, any research done in the months running up to the grand demenagement were useless.
However, through online research, parents advice and hours spent peering through shop windows a decision was made, we knew what we wanted the next question was getting it. BritGirl - ever one for planning and preparation - wrote a mini script of statements, questions/answers en francais to help her get the package..... Bank details were handed over, papers were signed without fully understanding what/where/when and how...all we knew was that something had been agreed, signed for and hopefully would be winging its way to our new apartment.....that something, we hoped would be a telephone, internet and TV service. In a whirlwind of french BritGirl and boyfriend walked out of the shop dazed and confused. "Was that what we wanted?" "Did I understand that correctly?" "So I think it will be delivered soon?"
Still no tears that week, in a way, when I look back now, it was the best week. It was Bordeaux in a bubble....there was little communication with the outside world (bar the need to order communication tools!!), it was just down to us, making a home, unpacking lives from boxes into an apartment....anyone can do it and make it fun! Its your native language and you feel safe.
Walks were had along the river to take a break from continual DIY. Another point to be made here, if anyone tells you that January in southwest France isn't cold, do NOT believe them, they are wrong! It was bitterly cold, the coldest winter on record in France for years (BritGirl can ignore the fact that the UK was too suffering near Polar weather, the point was, the southwest of France was cold and had seen snow!)....the wind whipped across the river and down the side streets, howling around our 3rd floor flat....but somedays that chill was needed to clear the head and focus on the task in hand...making a life in France.
9th - 10th January 2010 - The First French Weekend
So....where are we.....an apartment full of boxes and flat packed furniture and a van full of much the same.
Not much of interest can really be said about the first weekend in Bordeaux....the van was unpacked again.....burning muscles at this point, with all the lifting, carrying, pushing, pulling and climbing stairs. The furniture was built. The flat was full of cardboard, tools and semi-erect furniture.
The furniture was successfully built even with french instructions. It was somewhat time consuming and hard going....lots of swear words and plasters were needed...but over the two days the apartment became furnished....we had work tops, cupboards, Tv stands, shelves, beds, wardrobes....but most importantly we had a functioning oven, washing machine and fridge.
Little from boxes was removed, that would be saved for later in the week, it was a matter of getting furniture out of their flat packed state and up right...however, BritGirl did unpack one box firstly...her SHOES!! High heels in all sorts of colours and heels....at this point, she felt a little at home!!
The best thing about this weekend... finding the Italian restaurant at the end of Rue du Couvent, Brit Girl's new home! A revelation of scrummy food, brilliant wine, relaxed surroundings and very nice owners. This was soon to become a regular haunt and Brit Girl's only "voisins" (neighbours) that she knew.
The last point to be made about this weekend....still no tears from Brit Girl - 4 days in from leaving the UK and eventually making it to Bordeaux, a million miles away from her friends and comforts and no tears had been shed. Was this a good thing? What did it mean?
8th January 2010 - The First Big Shop
Friday!
But no excitement for the weekend for Brit Girl.....not really.
Just more tireless trips over the cobbles, along the narrow and cold corridor, only to be warmed by the trek up the stairs to the apartment.
Lets not forget this was early January - the coldest seen in Bordeaux for many years....and yes that was felt - fingers were aching and noses were cold.
Today was the day...would the sofa make it, in one piece upstairs?! Brit Girl's mathematically wired Dad had an ingenious plan surrounding angles, ropes and pully contraptions to navigate the narrow staircase and winding corners with the sofa. But, in the end it resulted in brut force, sheer pushing, pulling, swearing and with Brit Girl at the bottom of the sofa being squashed against walls, bannisters and the sofa.....but it made up to the apartment and narrowly through the living room door. However, please note, the likelihood of said sofa making its way back DOWN the stairs in two years time is highly UNLIKELY! It may well have to stay put.
You'd think that would be the hardest task, unpacking the van...but lest we forget there was still more furniture to be bought....yes, something you may well be unaware of. En France when you rent a flat unfurnished, it is just that. Mais oui, NOTHING in the kitchen but a sink...nothing, not a sausage, no oven, washing machine, cupboard - RIEN, NOTHING, NADA, ZERO.
So even when it reached 4pm and the van was empty - boxes were stored in the apartment and the big pieces of furniture from home in the UK were safely re-housed en France, a bigger task loomed for Brit Girl......to buy a washing machine, oven, fridge, freezer, cupboards, chairs, work tops........a whole new kitchen in fact. Not forgetting the need for a bed and mattress. And get this, it had to be done whilst the White Van Man was still en France......two days and counting.
So, Friday night, all squashed back into the white van a trip to the industrial estate was made. Now Brit Girl was most definitely not looking forward to this. The travel, the unpacking could all be done without really thinking about being in a foreign country...however, this exercise would most definitely highlight the fact that she didnt belong here, couldnt speak the language and perhaps was drowning with the nerves....but as ever, pragmatic, Brit Girl held her head up and marched into the shop -well aware that there was only an hour before the shop shut.
It was likely Supermarket Sweep gone mad....some shop assistants saw our panic and credit cards and ran around with us, "Yes, you can take that away today"; "No, that will be weeks before delivery"; "Right, we will take the more expensive option if we can take it today"; "Bien sur".
Others were some what more french, sitting in their chair, whilst we ran around getting descriptions and codes for them.....if you will this shop worked on the fairly "helpful" technique that only certain shop assistants could sell you certain goods, there was a "TV man", a "White Goods Man", a "Kitchen Man" and so on, yes they knew their stuff but it made the pace and ease of the whole experience in French less than simple.
At 7.15pm, fifteen minutes prior to closing Brit Girl stood with her credit card in hand ready to pay - close to tears after what felt like a lot of work in french, without truly understanding everything; had we really bought what we wanted/needed? Would we end up with the right boxes in the van? What happened if there was a problem? The list was endless but there was no time for that....credit card handed over, "All on this?" asked a bewildered and fairly rude cashier.
After time in this country, you realise it isnt rudeness, it is just their way, their approach to customer service, after a number of months it doesnt even register that how they speak or look at you maybe rude...it just is the way. But at that moment, after the 72 hours which had passed and the nerves and fear which was building - without a release of tears, it just felt rude, unhelpful and pretty unecessary to BritGirl - "Oui, tous".
The payment went through sans probleme....clearly the credit card would not know what hit it in this move...that was more money put on her credit card than Brit Girl had ever done before....it did not sit well at all, not one bit. So, next stop, the collection depot with the 8 pieces of paper(!) listing the purchases.
The shop was a little like Ikea, you order the vast quantities of furniture you need and the depot man brings them all out for you....except this time, it was a French men desperate to go home. After a fraught wait of worry and exhaustion (tears were close at this point), the little man wheeled out a number of trolleys and dumped them outside the White Van. We are talking a lots of boxes here....there was no way on earth these could all be checked to ensure that what had been paid for was there and even if there was a problem, there was no one to help. As soon as the last box was off the trolley, the doors were locked and shutters down - thats it, ferme - we were on our own.
But it was all done. The entire kitchen was now in the back of the White Van.....and you know what that means another day of unloading, unpacking and struggling up the stairs. Brit Girl should have felt pleased with herself, all the things that were needed had been bought and paid for in a short space of time in a foreign country and language, but right then, on that day, Brit Girl felt anything but pleased with herself - out of her depth, shy, unconfident and scared would probably be the best way to describe it. Somedays, even now, months later, these feelings remain.
But looking back now (months later), Brit Girl can say it wasn't as bad as it felt and it was the start of many hard and personally challenging exercises. Those feelings can still appear, the panic of talking to someone for fear of not understanding their response or asking for the wrong thing (a gros biere for example instead of a grand biere (fat or big)!). However, at that moment, on a cold and dark January evening, the move to France felt like the hardest task in the world and only highlighted the huge challenge which had hardly even started.
Thankfully, the next few days were to be easier....
7th January 2010 - The Apartment
So....where does that leave us? Brit Girl is en France! Easy from here surely...obstacles of snow, planes and trains all over, it can only be bread, wine, cheese and l'amour going forwards?!?!
Well, the first full day in France started off easily, there was little do - the plans had all changed at 4am the day before. Brit Girl had no keys to the new apartment -if you remember, when Brit Girl was meant to be collecting the keys she was actually still somewhere in the middle of France on the TGV. There was little to be done, except visit the nearest supermarche for additional cleaning tools -joy!
On this note a word of warning, it is not just the British who are proud of their queues, Brit Girl found this out on day one, after spending at least 20 minutes in a queue in the supermarche...no rhyme or reason, bar the general enjoyment of waiting, watching and waiting a little more.
The introduction to french bureaucracy and their love of paper was the next experience. A trip to the letting agent and in the region of 30 signatures later, the keys to Brit Girls new home were her's. YES that is true, you have to sign every document to show you have read it; "lu et approve" if you will - with the odd additional signature on some pages and paragraphs. Lets also be honest - the french mantra appears to be, "why use one word when you can use seven" - so there were contracts en francais, en anglais, swiftly followed by legal definitions and annexes to the contract, en francais bien sur....all to be "lu et approve".
There were surveys - for flooding, lead in the paint alongside the likely risks of natural disasters (rest assured Brit Girl was safe from volcanoes in her flat....although if you read on, ironically a volcano caused disruption a little later in this adventure!)! And dont forget four copies - one for the tenants, the letting agent, the owner and anyone else who cared to be bored rigid!
Anyway, yes paperwork en France is special - hours later, with the keys in hand Brit Girl headed to the apartment - still no tears....the overwhelming fear would hit once she was in the flat.....then the hard work would really be upon her and the reality of the whole situation crystal clear.
But that is not it for bureaucracy, mais non! En France, there is further admin when it comes to renting a property - an independent contractor assesses the property in terms of damage, its state and any repairs required (an 'entrance')....in the UK this is probably a five minute tick box exercise....but en France -after two hours and two pages of tick boxes and notes Brit Girl knew every possible crack, flaw, mark and problem that the two bedroom apartment had....
It looked like a good apartment, but upon closer inspection there were clearly problems...leaking taps, a leaking and wobbly toilet, holes in the walls and plaster and the best yet...severe and growing cracks and damp in the bathroom....at this point, yes, this is the point when Brit Girl wanted to run - ANYWHERE. The daunting task of moving abroad had hit. How would this be resolved? Who would arrange it? What happened when things did not get repaired? (Brit Girl would soon learn all about the need for french patience). How would ANY of this be dealt with in her A Level francaise? It just wasn't possible, was it?
The 'entrance' to the flat was harder than any 10 hour journey to France and harder than making the decision to leave home and move abroad....the complete unknown of what lay ahead suddenly became clear, the whole gigantic size of the task in hand....this was a country where Brit Girl knew no-one....well no-one local, could not really speak the language and without a job felt entirely pointless....and yet there were all these problems already, on day one?!
So, with the 'entrance' done you would imagine that Brit Girl would find a bottle of wine, a corner and mope.....but no, Brit Girl had no time for this....the lack of time over the next week would prove to be the best thing that could have happened - no time for worry/fear or nerves, well no time for them to get in the way!
At 4pm on the 7th January, that all important White Van was opened and half emptied. That sounds simple doesnt it, but reader, let me fully explain the location of this brand new (allbeit problem invested) apartment - see photo. A quaint little french Rue, with cobbles and tall three storey buildings. A friend would later tell Brit Girl how lovely and francais this road looked. Mais Oui, it is beautiful, but cobbles...cobbles and boxes, cobbles and heavy items, cobbles and a sack-barra do just NOT WORK! (Alas, neither do cobbles and high heels, but perhaps that is not important right now?!)
Before you can even worry about carrying items across cobbles, there is no parking! Oui, there is no room....nothing, nada...so the White Van was abandonned, it blocked garages and at times the road whilst Brit Girl's life was unloaded.
But the biggest hurdle yet to be faced outweighs these maggot sized issues ten fold....cancelled flights - simple, hijack a white van across the channel, lack of parking- simple block garages, cobbles - manage them! The apartment was situated at the end of a narrow, dark and cold corridor which was randomly littered with a selection of France's cycling history....old/new/irrepairable bikes taking up the majority of space. And then it was a climb up 3 flights of thin, winding, stone steps....having counted on the many trips up and down this staircase, Brit Girl can verify over 60 steps!
So after an hour of unpacking, Brit Girl could not feel her legs or arms....... wobbly does dont even begin to describe the feeling. But Brit Girl knew she could not stop, the van had to be unpacked and as a Girl who loves a challenge, this WOULD BE done in the least time possible.
So, over 60 steps, one way, with more than 30 boxes plus furniture and suitcases makes the fact that in 2 hours the White Van was half unpacked, a feat practically unimaginable.
Shattered both emotionally and physically - perhaps more physically on this day than previously, Brit Girl and family managed a meal, wine (of course!) and sleep....
6th January 2010 - The First Day of a New Life
OK, there is no easy way to write this....the day felt like it would go on forever...(this tries to be as brief as possible!)
4am - Up and dressed, in case it was all a dream (nightmare?) and a flight to Bordeaux would be reality...
4.15am - No chance, with the TV and internet on it was clear that Luton airport was CLOSED - No flights whatsoever due to heavy snow - this was Britain after all - my home country of greatness???
4.30am - Trip from Stevenage to the now empty flat.....hairy in the snow but we made it - a friend deserves a BIG pat on the back for that trip. And the purpose of a trip back to the empty "home"? Here the parents of Brit Girl waited, with the full white van, planning a trip through the channel tunnel and to Bordeaux....the new plan - to stow away in the van to France...after that was anyones guess.
5.15am - Once again, abandoning the empty flat....4 people squashed into a white transit van, in the snow, bound for France. There are probably lots of rules/laws broken in the next few hours but here goes....
7.00am - Arrive at the Channel Tunnel after a fairly eventless drive by Mr White Van Man....just squashed, dark, cold, nervous - lest we forget this was a move from home to France for a fair number of years. A lot of time was spent worrying/wondering where our earlier chauffeur had got to .... yes, that good friend who was up at 4am to drive us to rendez vous Mr White Van Man, had not confirmed he was home safe and sound out of the snow........pointless worry it turns out, he was all fine, just a little forgetful!
7.30am - Coffee at the tunnel - Brit Girl now felt VERY sick - we crept through security, no questions asked, all passports present and correct, even for the two additional (and somewhat uncomfortable) passengers...we boarded the train....France truly was going to be our next stop - there was no going back - this was IT.
9.00am - Now on French time and in Calais - Mr White Van Man had a plan - we cannot carry on throughout the length of France four people strong....so two of us, Brit Girl and her boyfriend would be dropped off at la Gare (train station) with a view to reaching Bordeaux, however long that would take and via whatever destinations....not forgetting the additional cost.
9.45am - So abandoned at Calais Gare - not the most attractive first stop of the adventure -Calais in the snow was far from picturesque (yes, France too had the white stuff!). Mais oui, from Calais a train ticket to Bordeaux was feasible - if we went back up 'norf', to go down 'sarth' again (Brit Girl wondered whether the french train system would be much different from the good ol' British train service...would we find the wrong sort of leaves or dare we joke, snow on the lines here?!), according to the helpful french lady at the station we should arrive in Bordeaux at 6.30pm - a full 8.5 hours after the intended "landing".
10am - Yes!! The right train was boarded...going to Lilles, where with a quick change onto the TGV Brit Girl would be heading to Bordeaux. Obstacle two completed (first obstacle of course was the lack of aeroplane) and only at a cost of E200 (! - gulp).
So, the sick feeling? Still there! The nerves? Still there? The worry? Yep, still there - lets face it Mr White Van Man and the entire life of Brit Girl may still not make it to Bordeaux - snow was now causing trouble across the main routes in France.....who knew what the next day or so would hold- but the definite answer was, it probably wouldn't be simple. And that, has become an everlasting strapline for life en France- it might not all be as simple as you first imagined!
A call to the letting agent was made - along the lines of - we won't be making the 2pm appointment - stuck in snow - only just in the country and at the very wrong end of it- great apologies....the response was typical (Brit Girl was to learn) - "but you have an appointment at 2pm?"
Yes....but clearly being in Calais and with lack of a helicopter or train faster than the speed of sound 2pm was just unrealistic. Ah to then find out that snow had played havoc with trams in Bordeaux made the trek thus far seem worth it (!)........Brit Girl did remember someone assure her that Bordeaux rarely saw snow - too far South! Clearly this was not true and later in January would again be confirmed as a mistruth if ever there was one.....whoever said moving further south assured better weather?
12pm -Arrival in Lille - pretty station but what felt like the worlds coldest - not expecting a snowy journey or vast periods of time outside, the outfit and shoes were not particularly suitable, scrap that, they were just a BAD BAD decision.
1pm - At 1pm on the 6th January 2010 Brit Girl made her first trip on the TGV - not nearly as exciting as you may imagine. It was just a normal train, with seats like a plane (!) and on this line it only went very fast in select destinations, which from what Brit Girl could make out were few and far between! So..... only 5.5 hours to fill......letters were written to friends - making light of 'day one of the adventure' and starting the many letters of "I miss you", "our banter isnt the same across the channel" and "do you miss me?"
4pm - News from Mr White Van Man, progress has been made - the white van - and the life and history of Brit Girl - was not that far behind the TGV. Point made that the TGV was not all that, a battered and fairly full english white van still made good progress in comparison on the french snow filled roads......we were all aiming for Bordeaux between 6.30pm - 8.00pm...what a day - or really what a night and a day.
6.30pm - Gare St Jean, Bordeaux - this is it, the new home for 2 years. Feelings? Completely numb, probably something to do with the earlier nervousness and definite tiredness -mentally and physically, travelling with worry is not simple.....but the trek across town was made - trams were all functioning normally now and it was just cold, no snow to be seen! Accomodation for the night found....things were looking up.
To cut the day short....the adventure is pretty much over as far as the 6th January goes. Mr White Van Man arrived at about 8pm, stories of travel mishaps were told, hot showers were had, lots of red wine and pasta was consumed at a restaurant we found and that was it day done. It was not as easy as it should have been, it aged all of us by about a year and Brit Girl has never really got over the feelings of that day....was it a sign? What a journey........
5th January 2010 - Last UK Day
The moving day...the day the flat, the British life, was packed into one white transit van....EVERYTHING!
Boxes had been packed for weeks....more boxes than ever imagined- full of memories, history, stories and of course shoes!! Looking back now, you could think that most of the memories and history in those boxes didnt need to make the journey. But then, a grey day occurs - its raining and cold outside, friends and family are distant and life en France isnt quite the adventure it should have been and those memories and history are more important to BritGirl than you could ever imagine...postcards from holidays past, old CDs, letters from friends and family going WAY WAY WAY back in time, notes stuck on BritGirl's car on her last day at work (!! - yes even that was kept!), the first silver service set used....another endless list, but they were all stowed safely away in a white transit van.
Around those boxes, a sofa was squashed in...... the van was ready, the flat was ghostly empty. No tears were shed at this point, which surprised BritGirl...it was just a matter of cleaning and leaving.
The plan was to spend a night with friends who lived near the airport and on the 6th January fly to Bordeaux where the new life would start with a new flat (the flat hunting was such a trial, that it will need a whole new blog to explain!) The white van would also leave the UK on the 6th and drive through la belle France for Bordeaux.
It must have been about 5pm on the 5th January, when the worry about weather set in....in typical British fashion - there was news of heavy snow fall affecting the south (lets face it, we had been plagued with snow on and off throughout December).
Surprisingly, no tears were shed on this day at all - not even with weather worry, but a very sick feeling was present, from the moment the empty flat was "abandonned" all the worry and fear set in....it seems that some of these nerves were not entirely in vain.
That night, the last British pub meal was had with very good friends - the best you could ask for in many ways - we laughed, we talked about the past, the present, the future, we planned and of course, we had a drink....but that didnt take our eyes away from the pub window and the snow falling...the ery silence of snow hit us as we left the pub - the sky was dark with an impending gloom that suggested hours of snow was still left to fall....at this point, the sick feeling worsened - would we really fly tomorrow?
That night, no matter how much sleep was needed after a week of New Year celebrations, tearful goodbyes and packing - no sleep was had.... instead there was just worry about the move, the distance, the fact the DDay had actually arrived (coincidental that DDay was a French event) and worsened by all likelihood that a white van with the whole contents of life and home would be travelling to Bordeaux in the morning, without BritGirl actually getting on a plane to join it at the other end.
....
Pre January 2010 - The Decision
It all started way before January 2010 for BritGirl...but how far back can a blog go?! Not sure its all that interesting, but basically the BIG decision to move to the wonderful country that is France was made in summer 2009..........from then on imagine mild panic, fear, hysteria, worry and excitment and you're somewhere close to the emotions experienced!
So the reason for this crazy decision I hear you ask? BritGirl's boyfriend had been offered a job in Bordeaux, the wine making region of France for 2 years. And this was not just any old job, it was an important job which could do wonders for his career and as BritGirl's friends and family often told her, it was a once in a life time opportunity and her own adventure.
Even now I am not entirely sure how the decision was made.....I am not entirely sure it was, it was an acceptance that there was a job, we were young, what could go wrong, lets give it a shot. A completely out of character action for BritGirl!
Lists were made.....research was done...questions were asked....friends were told. Important tasks had to be done first - BritGirl had to resign from her job - regardless of how much the job paid, was enjoyed or created important (and what were hoped to be) lasting friendships, think about boring but grown up issues - taxes, rent, mortgages, pensions...right before you drop off thats all on that subject for the moment!
So, the last six months of 2009 were a mixture of administration, panic, explanation, questioning (is this the right thing? can we afford it?), packing boxes - oh so many boxes were packed and re-packed and lasts....last day at work, the last trip in BritGirls car, last time BritGirl would visit friends so easily....the list seems endless.
The emotions felt during those six months were tough - it felt like a never ending fair ground ride of highs and lows - the fear of becoming unemployed, leaving a job which was fun (you might not believe this but its true), leaving friends old and new, worry of language and culture barriers, panic over the distance from friends, family and comforts of home, excitement - what an adventure it would be (some will tell you that any excitement felt was created by others - Brit Girl often felt more lows than highs).
But in short, thats the run up to January 2010 - when the big move, le grand demenagement, took place......and that is most definitely another story - of emotions and adventures - something that will be a re-occuring theme throughout this blog, emotions and adventures.....
An Introduction to the blog...
Hello or should it be bonjour?
The aim of this blog?
Good question......simply a vent for all thoughts, findings, experiences, accidents, dramas and adventures during 2 years en France!
Yep, Brit Girl - moved to France, wll Bordeaux to be exact, in January 2010 and has been meaning to document her thoughts since that fateful day in the snow when home became a foreign country and now....4 months to the day, she gets around to doing something about it!
So, 4 months to catch up on and another 20 months to go...lets see what happens!
Alors.....
The aim of this blog?
Good question......simply a vent for all thoughts, findings, experiences, accidents, dramas and adventures during 2 years en France!
Yep, Brit Girl - moved to France, wll Bordeaux to be exact, in January 2010 and has been meaning to document her thoughts since that fateful day in the snow when home became a foreign country and now....4 months to the day, she gets around to doing something about it!
So, 4 months to catch up on and another 20 months to go...lets see what happens!
Alors.....
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